Vicious Is The Name That They Gave Me: A Philly Story Page 15

  “I care about you,” I told her. Since I have been around Simya I felt as if we grew a sisterhood bond.

  “Same here,” She said.

  “If an opportunity presents itself for you to get out, would you take it?” I asked her.

  “I don’t know,” She answered. How could she not know?

  “You don’t owe anyone your life,” I told her. Instead of responding she gave a smirk.

  “Enough of this shit, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. So how are things with you and Taye?” she asked. Uhh, he’s the love of my life.

  “He texted me good morning and told me to have a good day. Simya, he is so perfect,” I said smiling.

  “Pause. No niggah is perfect,” She corrected.

  “He isn’t a niggah. He’s a gentleman,” I laughed. She laughed as well.

  “Uh huh, he gave you that good,” Simya joked.

  “It isn’t even about that though. We don’t talk about that all the time. We talk about life, goals, what we want,” I explained.

  “Oh, okay, well I’m happy for you. Just know to tread carefully,” She warned. I understood why she would warn me but she didn’t need to. These other guys do not compare to what he is. The guys my mother has dealt with do not compare to him.

  “I got you,” We continued to talk more on our way to the meeting.

  Chapter 25

  Retta

  Planning the squad’s party was the best thing that has happened this week and everything else, fuck it. I don’t care anymore. Most of these bitches did it to themselves. These Bitches are weak these days, like that doesn’t have anything to do with me. They attracted drama to each other. And then this is what irks the shit out of me, when things hit the fan they want to blame it on everybody else. I literally sat back to watch how these dumb ass girls get caught up in unnecessary bullshit on their own, willingly. In a heartbeat, they turn around and say it’s because of someone else. Come on, own up to your shit. I want one of these bitches to blame me for something. I dare them to. You see, my name hasn’t come up in anything. You don’t hear people blaming shit on me and I am not blaming shit on people. I am always low-key. Yes, we are in a squad and you know, we do our thing, but they let it get to their head. They don’t know how to keep their mouths closed. It’s not a deep-hearted bond we have. It’s about the money in my eyes. I don’t really fuck with them for real, for real. I mean I may portray that affect, but it’s just business. And I portray that affect very well. Don’t get me wrong, when shit gets rowdy and I do ride. We’re ridahs.

  Chanelle had called an immediate meeting. While I am making my way to the chambers, I thought about how someone stole the money. Luckily, I did not put all of my money in there. I bet some of the girls did. With all the madness going on somebody is going to die again. A squad should not operate like that. No type of organization or communication. I needed to work on an exit strategy. It’s time for me to do my own thing now. Chanelle and I may seem close and all, but trust me there is nothing close about us except money. Working with Chanelle is like working with a devil. You always have to be a bitch, it always has to be her way or get the fuck out of her way it always has to be this and that. Shut the fuck up, how about that way? I was doing my part as a ridah. I was a faithful ridah. No matter what, even if I don’t like you and you’re a part of the squad I’m going to ride for you. I have a true squad spirit. True squad spirit? I just made that shit up. What the hell is a true squad spirit? I laughed to myself.

  I know I talk about these girls as if they are not anything. I might say a couple of negative comments that are not needed to be said but I still ride regardless. While I don’t like Chanelle’s trifling, gold digging, smutty ass, I still ride. I’m a true ridah. Some of the girls are not true ridahs, pulling schemes on each other and being disloyal. Some of them work with our enemies. Bitch, you are disloyal. So fuck it, I’m going to do the same shit. You want to jeopardize our lives when you want to work with outsiders, well I’m going to do the same thing. I truly believe an outsider broke into the safe. One of these dumb ass girls told whoever where the safe was. That was not an all of a sudden robbery. Let me find out who was part of it, it’s going to be over.

  I have to admit before working with Chanelle, I was working with Tonya. Yeah, the same ugly bitch who has a problem with Chanelle. Tonya is more of an associate. We are mutual. I stopped working with Tonya because some of the things she was getting involved with, I just was not going to do. Despite how ugly she is; she still gets money. I can’t even hate. We blow every now and then. I decided to call and see what was up with her.

  “Hello,” She answered the phone in an exhausted tone.

  “Hey bitch, what’s up? Are you asleep?” I asked her. It was like three in the morning.

  “Yeah, what’s good with you?” she asked.

  “I’m on my way to the chambers, we got a little meeting,” I told her. Our association to each other will always remain irrelevant to the squad. While we still keep in contact with each other from time to time, we do not discuss what is going on within our squad. I don’t ask her anything and she doesn’t ask me anything. We just talk about other shit and smoke. She has like the best weed in the city. Tonya is well connected. The bitch is ugly as shit, though.

  “Oh yeah, so how did that party go. I was trying go up there but I got held back with shit,” She told me.

  “Shit was popping until Chanelle came downstairs and ruined it,” I told her.

  “For real?” She started laughing. “What did she do?” Tonya asked. I’m not obligated to tell Tonya about the money being stolen out of the safe. It’s one of our rules. We don’t discuss what happens within our squad.

  “She kicked everybody out,” I snapped.

  “Damn, she drawling. Why did she do that?” she asked. She wanted details. I told her what I wanted her to know.

  “It’s because she wanted to be a bitch, you know how she gets,” I lied.

  “Yeah, it’s like her,” she agreed.

  “Yeah,” I said. I never quite thought about if shit were to go down between Chanelle and Tonya. Whose side would I take? I would take Chanelle’s. Like I said, we just blow and buss it up. There is no bond.

  “How long is your meeting?” she asked.

  “I don’t even know how long this bullshit is going to be. I’m going to hit you up when it’s over,” I told her. I could tell she wanted to get off the phone. People start asking questions like, “When are you going to be finished? How long are you going to be? You know, shit you don’t know until you get there. I didn’t hold a grudge. I’m going to let Tonya go about her business. I might have interrupted her.

  “Alright girl, I’m going to let you go,” I told her.

  Alright, I’m going to finish what I was doing before you called,” she stated.

  “Bitch, I thought you were sleeping?” I asked jokingly. She laughed and I heard noises in the background.

  “I was,” She laughed.

  “Uh, huh, fucking hoe,” I teased.

  “So what,” She knew I was playing with her.

  “Alright,” We hung up. I was around the corner from the chambers. This is bullshit now I have to listen to. I needed a sip of vodka before going in here. At the stop light, I reached to the back seat and pulled out a bottle. I took two shots and continued to drive.

  Chapter 26

  Kassidy

  “Are you cool Kas?” Tamika asked. She knew when something was bothering me.

  “Besides what Chanelle did, I’m cool,” I lied to her. I am not doing well. I wanted to beat the hell out of Chanelle. As if that will knock some sense in to her, probably not. I should put her out of her misery. But I can’t. I can sit in the car and name everything I want to do to her. I can actually come up with ideas and not do any of them. No matter how mad I am with Chanelle or what she does, I will always find it in my heart to forgive her nutty ass. I don’t know where I am going to find forgiveness, but I’m sure it will happen. Onl
y time will tell when it actually does happen. Tamika took her phone out of her pocket as it vibrated. I can tell she didn’t want to answer, but she did anyway.

  “Yeah, Mae,” she greeted. “No I don’t know. Well, I’ll look for it when I get in the house. Whatever, you know, - alright, Mae. Alright then, I’ll deal with it later,” Tamika said as she hung up and put the phone on her lap.

  “Is everything alright?” I asked her.

  “Yeah, it’s Mae and her crazy ass! Umm, Kas,” Tamika called my name is a strange tone.

  “Yeah,” I wondered what she was going to say next.

  “Do you know some girl name Kiyah?” she asked. Kiyah? Do I? I know so many females that I forget their names. I would have to see what she looks like.

  “Naw, don’t ring a bell. Why?” I asked her.

  “Okay, do you know some girl name Paris?” she asked. Where are these girls’ names coming from? What am I missing?

  “What is up with all these questions?” It was time I started getting some answers.

  “Calm down Kas,” she said.

  “I wasn’t even that hype,” I told her.

  “Uh, yea, you were. Kiyah and Paris are the ones that robbed you,” she informed. After Chanelle kicked everybody out, I went and hung out with Tamika. I told her what happen at the party with the safe. Kiyah? Paris? Who the fuck are these girls? Why have I never heard of them?

  “Who are they? Do they have a problem with somebody in my squad?” I asked her.

  “Yeah, ya sister, it’s you. Kassidy your sister is in some real deep shit and you are too. Mae really meant it when she told you that the other day.” Tamika reminded me what happened when I was over her house with Mae. Mae was about to be unconscious if I had put my hands on her. I kept that in mind. Come to think of it, Mae is always finding out some shit. I am starting to question how she knows these things. Like bitch, whose side are you on for real?

  “People still think I shot Dymond?” I asked her. You need to ask why the hell Dymond was down there with the people. But nobody is going to ask that. That’s too smart of them to do.

  “Not only that, you snitched on Nelly,” Tamika informed. No I didn’t. Who the fuck is lying about me?

  “No, I didn’t. I told you what happened when we went out there,” Now I was starting to get hyper.

  “I know, I know,” Tamika said trying to calm me down. Too late, I’m already on ten.

  “Well, what do Kiyah and Paris have to do with this?” I asked.

  “They work for Tonya,” she answered. My head dropped. The fuckery I deal with.

  “Get the fuck out of here, stop playing,” I told her. I didn’t want to believe that. Tonya needs to stop playing. She is not the only one with a squad and goons. Like the bitch doesn’t really want the work. As I think about the other day the incident that happened in the bathroom at the party when Vicious was fighting that girl, she was beating her ass. I think her name was Kiyah. Most likely, Tamika is talking about her.

  “Nobody is playing. Tonya is sending Paris and Kiyah to you and your sister because of what you did with Nelly and Chanelle because she was fucking Dollah,” Tamika informed. Well isn’t this some shit. Instead of Tonya coming to me directly, she sends bitches after me. Tonya would never confront me anyway. I am not even worried about her. She doesn’t want that work. What I am trying to understand is why they are going back and forth over a dead dick. Get over it, the niggah is dead. She was under his benefits or something. It isn’t like the niggah had social security or pension.

  “I’m not worried about Tonya, she isn’t about anything,” I told Tamika as I took out a bag of weed to roll up. I need to ease my nerves.

  “Apparently she is. Since she was able to get into where the safe was,” Tamika made a point. She is good at getting people to steal for her. What I am really concerned about is who told her where the safe would be. Someone in this squad is a traitor. Now I am going to have to be on guard. I need to watch the girls around me and who may come after me. “I know she pretty much screwed you over and all, I hate to say this,” She paused. “Tonight might be your last night,” Tamika said. I looked at her in disbelief. Well damn, our last night, though.

  “Well damn, what else is about to happen because it sounds like you know more than what you are saying,” I told Tamika. Why would she even say shit like that? Is she with Tonya too? At this point, my trust in people was starting to diminish. Despite the number of things Chanelle put me through, I still forgave her and I will always have her back. Even though she used my name to get out on bail, I still forgave her. And even when she used my car as a getaway while doing some shit with Retta and got it totaled, I still forgave her. I never really did anything to hurt Chanelle. That’s my fucking sister. She is all I have and all I had. What happened between Chanelle and Roc, I’m slowly getting over it. I’m over him but now over what she did with him. Why do I keep forgiving her? I don’t know, she’s my sister. People in the world would fuck you over and so can family.

  I closed my eyes and thought about what I was going to do in the little time I had since we are about to die according to Tamika and her eavesdropping sister. I thought about the old times Chanelle and I had together. I remember Chanelle and I stole over five hundred grand. When we got back to the city we booked ourselves a vacation with the other girls in the squad and went to Jamaica. Back then, everyone was loyal to each other. All the girls had their own individual reasons for being in the squad. I remember when we all were there for each other. At that time no one was getting killed. Yes, we were doing shit, but no one was dying. I remember we used to have barbeques at the house, throw parties, and had several movie nights. I remember the night we were in the back of the house sitting on the deck and we all shared our stories. Memories were made as emotions were being revealed. I used to look at these girls as my sisters. I use to love being around them. I use to have respect for them. We always had each other, were ridahs. We were getting so much exposure around the city just from our name alone, Tha Philly Ridahs. Bitches wanted to join our squad. Niggahs wanted to be our goons. We were the shit. No one could fuck with us, we stood as a team.

  I remember the time we came back from somewhere. I forgot where but we were standing in line waiting to get our boarding pass when a lady walked by and bumped Chanelle. Chanelle turned around to the lady.

  “Excuse you, I know you saw me standing here. What the fuck! Show some respect with your bald headed ass,” Chanelle said loud enough that everyone near could hear. The people in line started to laugh. The lady suddenly turned around and walked back towards Chanelle.

  “What did you say? You better get the fuck out before you get fucked up around here,” The lady said getting real hype. Chanelle was already having a bad day, she just charged towards the lady. Next thing I know the lady was on the floor. It happened so fast.

  “Recognize this face bitch, because the next time I’m going to take you out of your misery,” Chanelle threatened. She is such a bully. And the other girls from the squad were standing around making sure authorities were not heading our way. I guess what I am trying to say is, at one point in time we always had each other’s backs. We have gotten into some crazy things, and as long as we had each other, we were able to handle anything. I laughed to myself. I’m always going to love my sister. I am going to try and get Chanelle and me out of this mess.

  “Kassidy. Kassidy,” Tamika yelled at me. I was in a deep daze.

  “Huh,” I answered.

  “Did you hear me?” she asked me.

  “No, what did you say?” I asked her, smoking my blunt. I don’t remember Tamika asking me anything.

  “I said Mae’s source told her. They saw Paris and Kiyah break into the safe. What are you going to do?” Tamika asked me.

  “I’m going to figure something out,” I told her.

  “Wow,” She was surprised.

  “What? Can’t I help my sister out?” I asked her. Mae put Tamika through so much shit and Tamika i
s always helping her get out of it. Or is it what’s good for one is not good for the other? However, that saying goes.

  “No I didn’t say that. I just said wow. No matter what you still come through for your sister. That’s some real unconditional love,” She said. Yeah it is.

  “So where can I find Kiyah and Paris?” I asked her inhaling and exhaling my blunt.

  “There’s more to this,” She added. What now?

  “Say it,” I told her.

  “Don’t you think they knew where the safe was because someone in your squad said something?” she asked. I thought of that same question as well. I already knew one of these bitches, just which one or is it all.

  “Who?” I knew Tamika knew.

  “Ceyanna and Vicious,” She said. Huh?

  “What?” I was in shock. I really am. I don’t know how Mae finds things out, but Ceyanna and Vicious? I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Just like how people are saying I set Nelly and I killed Dymond. I don’t know what was true and what wasn’t true.

  “You know Nelly is right,” She told me. This bitch. For the last time I did not set her up. She got caught and I got away. It’s just that simple. Furthermore, let’s get this war popping. May the baddest bitches in Philly win, which we will.

  “Alright,” I told her.

  “When you leave the meeting come straight to my house,” Tamika said.

  “Alright,” I was ready for war.

  When Tamika pulled up around the back of the chambers, she turns towards me. Tamika has been everything; a real friend anyone could ask for. I don’t know how to thank her for everything. I started to think about our times back in the day. I remember the time I came to her and told her I was pregnant and wanted an abortion. I got pregnant at a young age and I wasn’t ready to be a mother at the time. The more Tamika talked to me, the more I thought about not having an abortion. I wasn’t ready for parenthood. I knew we would not be ready for that. I named my son Carmelo after his father who is C-Roc. I asked my Aunt Bethany to look after him until I find a way to get away from this life. I didn’t want raise my son around this type of life. He deserves better. Roc understood my decision but it’s not like he goes with me to visit him or sends him any money. He is such a fucking dead beat father. Every month I send my aunt money for her to take care of him and visit him twice a month. Hopefully I will get out of this life soon, so I can go back to my son. Soon I will be ready for him to come home and call my name while running into my arms. Carmelo is three years old now. I had him when I was thirteen. I do not regret having my son. I regret letting my sister talk me into joining the squad. When all of this is over I am going to get my son and live a normal life, you know not being in the streets. I have to give Tamika credit for being such a great godmother to Carmelo. She truly is a blessing.